Identifying lessons in a negative situation can be hard at times.
We’re sure you’ve heard the phrases ‘there’s always a silver lining’, or ‘there is a lesson here, what is it?’
Failure is not negative unless you give it permission. In every so called ‘failure’ there absolutely is a lesson to be learned. The lesson may just simply be ‘don’t do it that way again’….or there could be a profound wake-up call for you to do something completely differently, or even just try harder doing the same thing again.
For example, when athletes start training for an event, they don’t suddenly run a four-minute mile. They consider how they are going to approach their challenge, and then create a plan and work towards their goal. They don’t say they’ve failed because on their first run they’ve not reached their goal. Many people consider things in their life as a failure, when all that is needed sometimes, is looking at the situation from a different viewpoint.
Here are some questions to ask yourself
WHAT do you consider has gone wrong?
WHY do you believe it has gone wrong?
WHAT could you have done things differently?
WHEN will you try again?
By reviewing and reassessing what happened, you are then able to decide whether it really is a failure, or if you are over reacting. Quite often, a few simple tweaks may result in a completely different outcome, the next time you attempt whatever you feel went wrong last time around.
On the other hand….you may not be in a position to have a re-run. In which case, then how do you find the positive from the negative? Well, not every single situation has a positive aspect. Death for example. How can that be considered positive? Some things in life cannot be positive no matter how they are dressed up.
The trick then, is to be realistic but not too hard on yourself either. It’s a question of balance and context. One person’s failure may not even register on another person’s radar.
Don’t beat yourself up for things that are out of your control. Use positive language wherever you can so that your sub-conscious mind will, in time, automatically seek the more positive view point.